Do you ever just get into a deep deep hole of restlessness and just feel entirely drained… Well I’ve felt like that for awhile!
Holding together my faith, family, education and social life all at once has recently not been in my favor. Anybody else having trouble prioritizing everything right now? Learning to let go of things that I can’t control or even things I can control has been extremely hard for me! I feel like The Lord is slowly changing my heart to fit in all the things that are actually important. If you’ve met/know me you probably wouldn’t know that I’m a very controlling person… Not so in a sense of controlling people but pretty much everything else. It hasn’t really been until this year I’ve found that my perfectionism is a big problem. Lately I’ve been so impatient with the Lord! Trusting in his timing has never been harder for me!!! There’s Gods little voice telling me I had good reason to create a blog and the other loud voice is telling me everything and anything that I don’t want to listen to. It’s quite sad the one I keep convincing myself with through. You have no idea the amount of blog post drafts I have written! ? I finally decided just to share it all at once, to get everything off my chest and start somewhere new. So recently I’ve decided to enroll in a couple of college classes just for the fun of it… Just joking, ? but it actually has me a little freaked out to be honest! I kind of have no idea what to expect, but I’m also really looking forward to it! (Really if anyone has any tips on note taking or studying please feel free to share with me!) The plus side of it all is that Jesus sure does spoil me with mass + adoration for all the semesters to come!
I’ve been slowly feeling pretty happy that autumn is around the corner, I’m just awaiting the colder weather, going to class, and cuddling up in the evenings! For some reason I feel like there is nothing like a steady routine!
To be honest this summer has went nothing like I thought it would! I went into summer thinking up all the ways I was going to grow or dive deeper into my faith and in a way I did! But also in a another way I didn’t. Summers are for time… I had A LOT of time. Lets just say I didn’t use it wisely! So many times have I failed on my faith, all the reminders to pray the rosary just ignored, all the times I had nothing to do and could’ve read about a saint or even the Bible. Ah, just saying procrastination and laziness are some of the hardest things that get thrown at me by the enemy!
But you know what? I’m still pushing through! ? I’m getting back up and Starting fresh in a new season!
“Though the seasons change, your love remains.”